Every photographer knows the moment: you step into a home or a hospital room, the family is polite but stiff, and you can feel a wall between you and the people you came to photograph. Learning how to break the awkward first 30 minutes of a family session is a skill most of us were never formally taught.
In this episode of The Motherhood Anthology podcast, TMA mentor Suzy Brown steps in as guest host for a one-on-one coaching call with TMA member Kailey Skillern, a photographer six months into taking on clients. Suzy has spent almost two decades photographing families in Chicago, and she chose someone early in her journey because Kailey’s questions (Is this normal? Does this happen to everybody? How do professionals handle it?) are ones photographers keep asking long after their first year.
Leading a Family Photography Session From the First Hello
Suzy’s first piece of advice for the awkward opening of a session is to leave the camera in the bag. When she arrives at a home, she sets her bag down and greets the family the way she would greet a friend, asking how everyone is doing, admiring the baby, and letting the conversation begin. The first few minutes feel just as awkward for parents as they do for the photographer, and before long the family relaxes and Suzy finds herself running out to grab her camera.
Suzy explains that everything leading up to a session is a chance to set the tone, whether that means guiding clients on what to wear for a curated, artistic experience or sending a thoughtful questionnaire for a more collaborative one. A Zoom call of 15 or 20 minutes is one of her favorite tools. She asks whether the family has had professional photos before, how that felt, and how each partner feels about being photographed. There is no single right time to book the call, so she encourages photographers to test offering it at inquiry or right after booking and keep whatever feels best.
The same thinking applies to extended family sessions, which Kailey asked about because she wants to avoid a row of relatives simply saying cheese. Suzy suggests learning everyone’s ages and how the family likes to play together during the call, then planning moments of play around that. On session day, a quick team powwow helps: she tells the group the session is meant to be relaxed, that they do not need to look at her constantly, and that she will guide them through playing together.
Real Session Moments
Kailey’s love for fresh 48 and newborn sessions has a personal origin. While expecting her son, she booked a photographer for fresh 48 photos, and when she reached out to say she was in labor, the photographer told her she could no longer come. Kailey’s own camera was dead, so she photographed her newborn on her phone. That experience is why she shows up for every mom she works with, and why she is willing to find another photographer if she cannot be there herself, because “you never get this time back.”
Suzy finds real comfort in stories like this. In her experience, a photographer who delivers a standout experience from the first email through the session itself can outperform financially a more accomplished artist who does not show up well for clients. Kailey’s early results support that idea: she expected to earn around $500 in her first six months and has brought in almost $2,500.
Then there is the session every photographer eventually meets. At Kailey’s most recent in-home newborn session, the dad was still in his pajamas and did not want to step into the nursery. Forty-five minutes in, she got him to place his hands around his baby girl’s feet, and afterward he admitted it was not that bad. She kept the pajama photo in the gallery, because she loves documenting how a day really was.
Suzy offered a helpful way to think about reluctant dads, describing three tiers. In the first, he quietly does it for his partner. In the second, it is clear he would rather not be there but he participates. The third is rude or disrespectful behavior, which deserves zero tolerance. For the second tier, she leads with empathy paired with self-respect, laughs it off, and asks how the family likes to play together, even asking the kids what they most want to do with dad. If he stays reluctant, she gives him a job, like fetching a bag or a glass of water for mom.
Permission to Show Up Imperfectly
Underneath the practical tips, the conversation keeps returning to mindset. Suzy points out that photographers carry the same questions for years and that “we just get better at not saying them out loud.” When she asked Kailey about a mindset shift, Kailey shared that photos do not have to be perfect, that blurry pictures can be sweet, and that a mom looking over the bassinet at her baby is worth capturing. In her words, “you don’t have to have a stunner magazine worthy photo every time.”
Kailey also shared why she loves the repetition of fresh 48 sessions. As a dental hygienist, she repeats the same process every day, and each person still brings a new conversation, which gives her room to master her craft. Suzy offered that perspective as permission for any photographer who feels they should be endlessly creative: there is something freeing in the predictability of a routine.
Conversations like this one show what a supportive education community makes possible. Kailey has been a TMA member for only two months, and she used this coaching call to ask the questions many photographers keep to themselves. Inside TMA, members find mentors like Suzy and a community that treats those questions as a normal part of building a business. As Suzy puts it, great work comes from “a lot of really simple things to do,” supported by the perspective shifts that make a photographer brave enough to do them.
Listen and Learn More
If the first 30 minutes of your sessions feel stiff, or you have wondered how to handle a reluctant parent or a large extended family, this coaching call offers encouragement and practical ideas you can use at your next session. Listen to Suzy and Kailey’s full conversation wherever you get your podcasts.
Find Suzy at simplybysuzy.com or on Instagram at @simplybysuzy.
Find Kailey at kaileyskillernphotography.com or on Instagram at @kaileyskillern.photography.
Ready to build a business that reflects your own creative voice? The Motherhood Anthology membership gives you access to expert mentors, live coaching, monthly marketing suites, and a private community of photographers who are invested in your success. Learn more and join at themotherhoodanthology.com.
The Motherhood Anthology is a community and educational resource for photographers who want a profitable and sustainable business they love. With 15+ expert mentors and 7+ years of proven content, TMA helps portrait photographers build confident, thriving businesses through monthly education, mentorship, and a supportive community of 700+ members.
